Friday, August 25, 2006

A manager's story

The manager of a large corporation got a heart attack, and the doctor told him to go for several weeks to a farm to relax. The guy went to a farm, and after a couple of days he was very bored, so he asked the farmer to give him some job to do.

The farmer told him to clean the shit of the cows. The farmer thought that to somebody coming from the city, working the whole life sitting in an office, it will take over a week to finish the job, but for his surprise the manager finished the job in less than one day.

The next day the farmer gave to the manager a more difficult job: to cut the heads of 500 chickens. The farmer was sure that the manager will not be able to do the job, but at the end of the day the job was done.

The next morning, as most of the jobs in the farm were done, the farmer asked the manager to divide a bag of potatoes in two boxes: one box with small potatoes, and one box with big potatoes.

At the end of the day the farmer saw that the manager was sitting in front of the potatoes bag, but the two boxes were empty. The farmer asked the manager: "How is that you made such difficult jobs during the first days, and now you cannot do this simple job?"

The manager answered: "Listen, all my life I'm cutting heads and dealing with shit, but now you ask me to make decisions."

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Why Blogging?

According to Wikipedia:

blog is a type of website where entries are made (such as in a journal or diary), displayed in a reverse chronological order.

Modern blog are evolved from online diary and it often provides commentary or news and information on a particular subject, such as food, politics, or local news.

Ok, back to today topic, why blogging?

It's complicated. But I simplify it into two categories.

First category is to share the happiness, ideas, talents and secrets.
For example, you have a very nice joke, what will you do. Tell yourself? Or tell the whole world about this funny joke? Or you have a very good idea but none of your friend understand you genius idea.

Blogging is one of the best ways to share these information. The more people share with you, the happier you are.

The second group of people do blogging is to share their sadness, pressures, sorrows. Complain about the government, how stupid your boss is, or how stupid you are. Telling to friend may have some risk because they will blog it. They will get happier but not you.

Thus, the best way is to just put a nick name and express all you dissatisfactions to the world. The more people share your burden, the more lightly you are.

No matter which type of blog you are having, just blog it and you may cheer lot of people out there.


Friday, August 18, 2006

If this is your boss?
A Chinese man walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer.

He tells the loan officer that he is going to China on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Chinese man hands over the keys to a new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank. He produces the title and everything checks out. The loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the Chinese for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the Chinese returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"

The Chinese replies: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for 2 weeks for only $15.41 and Expect it to be there when I return?
What can I say? orz boss!

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Corporate Lesson

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there miserably in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story:

1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

Corrporate lesson: The crow and the rabbit

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story is:

To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Am I alone?

An electronics engineer working in air conditioning contractor firm is lonely. It's difficult to express yourself or maybe I should say it's difficult to apply your knowledge in this area.

The most happiness moment is when I see the control system is running perfectly, hmmm..... maybe not 100% perfect. Then the remaining suffering day is to go to client site to help them to power up tripped MCB / switch or restart the PC. I hope one day I can do it remotely.

All the while I'm thinking I'm alone but until today I found out a genius hidden inside my office. At last I got someone can talk to using same language / protocol :)

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

It's personal

Do you ever thinking buying a car with GPS, leather seat, nice interior and exterior design, with only 1300cc engine to accelerate from 0 to 100 km/hr within 6 sec? This will be a best of the best. How about this car got only 2 tires?

OK, for me this is motorcycle not a car.

How about now, a mobile phone with 3G, slim design, multimedia ready, with expandable memory capability, and not only colour screen but large colour touch screen. Isn't it best of the best. How about I told you that this phone do not have camera, not even a 300k pixel.

OK, for me this is an useless 3G phone. Surprisingly, someone is coming with this design.

The main objective behind 3G is about video streaming not data. Data is a bi-product of 3G. The main technology focus on data transfer are High-Speed Downlink Packet Access (HSDPA) and 802.16e (mobile WiMax).

I can't really understand the designer behind all these phones. Just a small camera and these phones will dominate the market.

Well, I'm an engineer. As usual, engineer don't talk about money but features. No matter how good is the "car", if it's 2 tires, it just a motorcycle.

A 3G phone without a camera is just a rubbish that used to fill up sea level. Please donate all these phones to Singapore.

p.s. by a very disappointed engineer that want to buy M600i.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

A meaningful story

A man went to school to learn chinese writing. The first day, the teacher teach him to how to write one. "One is a horizontal line", said the teacher. The second day, the teacher teach him to write two. "Two horizontal lines is a two in chinese", said the teacher. And the third day, the teacher teach him to write three. "Three horizontal lines is a three in chinese", said the teacher again. The man get excited and quit from school.

One day, he want to write a letter to his friend Wan (ten thousand in chinese). He had used a whole day just to write his friend's surname.
I still remember my teacher told me this story when I was in primary school. The story teach us to learn knowledge sincerely. Guess what, I saw someone is still haven't graduate from primary school working in my company.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Do you still want to tell the truth?

A chemist, a biologist and an electrical engineer were on death row waiting to go in the electric chair. The chemist was brought forward first.
"Do you have anything you want to say?" asked the executioner, strapping him in.
"No," replied the chemist.
The executioner flicked the switch and nothing happened. Under State law, if an execution attempt fails, the prisoner is to be released, so the chemist was released.

Then the biologist was brought forwards.
"Do you have anything you want to say?", asked the executioner
"No, just get on with it." reply the biologist.
The executioner flicked the switch, and again nothing happened, so the biologist was released.

Then the electrical engineer was brought forwards.
"Do you have anything you want to say?" asked the executioner.
"Yes," replied the engineer. "If you swap the red and the blue wires over, you might make this thing work."